Screen Addict Shepherd Gifts

"It's an easy job these days: the sheep don't wander around anymore, they stare at their phones all day long..."

Shepherd and eurydice

"Staff support"

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

A sheep dog has stacked the sheep four high - 'He used to be with the circus before he came to the farm...!'

Please Drove Carefully.

'I'm afraid you don't have the leadership qualities we're seeking.'

Sheep dog late for work

'There's nothing on.'

Lamb Noise.

A Highlander Chasing Dogs with a Knife and a Broom.

'It's 'baa baa' here and 'baa baa' there, until I'm just about nuts.'

"Well, I'll miss him, but all his friends are backpacking Europe to herd sheep this summer, too."

A tourist watches a television on the back of a donkey

Sheep Ledger

"For goodness sake, not again, it's day-time but we can't see the sky: It must be another oil spill..."

My phone is synced with my tablet, my tablet is synced with my laptop ... but none of them are synced with me."

"You'll love this model, sir! You won't have to miss any of the sports action when you go for a beer!"

"Don't open me, you fool!"

Binge Watch

"If she thinks I'm just gonna come running on home, wagging my tail behind me..."

'You're suffering from job-stress insomnia. Stop counting sheep to fall asleep.'

Binary Man

Summer in Elysium and The long vacation in Arcadia

Spooning

Merry Christmas.

'How are you at thinking outside the flocks?'

'...doomed...from here...to eter...nity...'

"And always remember...If you're going to be sick, always do it on the carpet. It's more absorbent."

'Jock's a real gentleman as far as we sheep are concerned... He knows how to play the bagpipes, yet doesn't!'

The return of the four sheepskins

"The kid's good."

"If He didn't want us to eat it, why'd He wrap the whole thing in bacon?"

'This'll save a couple of journeys!'

"It's harder to 'lead from the middle' than I thought."