Scientific Storytelling Aficionado T-Shirts

"I think everyone appreciates the difficulties of getting published, competition is brutal."

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

"It does have a side effect. You'll faint when I tell you how much it will cost to produce."

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

"Is it that bad?"

Victor Hugo

'Where was the TSA?'

'You're going to have your future cut out for you, reading bedtime stories.'

'Upon entering the rain forest...' 'Thousands of unknown species, and we can fool around with the genes of every one of them.'

"We have to take that science away from Tommy...he's genetically modified the cat!"

"Finally, the alphabet is paying off."

Goodnight Moon for the Misbegotten

Grizzly bears are gregarious animals.

"It started with a simple case of peer-review."

See, Catty-O? I told you dinner was included with admission.

Welcome to the moon cafe and gift shop...

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

'You were great at 'Daniel in the Lion's Den!' -- I'd sure like to hear you do 'The Three Little Pigs' sometime!'

"What your memoir really needs is an addiction."

"I'm going to get you fired."

The Origins of Everything

"And that's when the therapist suggested… exposure therapy!"

"Nobody's perfect, but we're working on it."

Graduation Speech.

'How about a toast to my breakthrough?!'

'The doctor says he's going to have to give you a few more tests...'

'Fyodor Dostoevsky sends weeks describing Alexy Karamazov's quest for a white whale, and then discards the entire chapter."

"It's true, mommy...the chocolate bunny attacked me - it was self-defense!"

"Do you realize that you and I have it in our power to cause quite a brouhaha?'

'I wonder how Curious George fits into all this?'

Hansel and Gretal

'And the wicked stepmother looked into her smartphone and said, "Selfie, selfie in my face, who's the fairest in this place?"

"This is what's known as a book."

"Papi, will you play build-a-model-rocket-so-we-can-calculate-acceleration-rates-and-thrust-levels-for-maximum-payload with me? Please?!"

"I'm so sorry I let you talk me into letting you take your pet along on this trip!"