Scientific Satire Gifts

'Why Isaac Newton kept returning to alchemy...' 'There's just no money in gravity.'

"You have to ask yourself, is it even worth finding the cheese anymore!"

"It does have a side effect. You'll faint when I tell you how much it will cost to produce."

Heart surgeon tastooing patients heart with "Love".

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

'Intelligent Design? My arse!'

'I couldn't think of a science fair project so I just re-invented the wheel.'

"Up here, light is neither a particle nor a wave. It's a liquid."

"The following program was made possible by fluctuations in the random chaos of the Universe...."

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

Einstein develops his theories that time is relative while ordering at a fast food restaurant.

"Walking erect is very trendy now."

"It started with a simple case of peer-review."

"Do you remember when we used to put FOOD in food?"

'Still think nuclear testing is harmless?'

I told you we were late!

"I'm going to get you fired."

Strainspotting

"This may surprise some of your viewers, but I didn't actually want to go into the box."

"Can you stop complaining about historical inaccuracy and try to enjoy yourself for one minute?"

"And now, speaking against the theory of evolution..."

'I know it's controversial, but my calculations prove beyond doubt that a nod is BETTER than a wink.'

'Einstein's blackboard as he left it'

Publisher. "The Laws of Motion " is a little dry for a title, Mr. Newton. How about something catchier like "When Push Comes to Shove"?

"The blood test will take a couple of days, but I'm pretty sure it's just ketchup."

"I have good news and bad news about your cat, Dr Schrodinger..."

Brian surgeon squeezing brains from a tube.

"Not guilty by reason of genetic determinism, Your Honor."

"They've got me doing cosmetics research."

So You've Cloned Yourself

While you're at it, will you sew on my shirt button please?

"I'll tell you, mock jury duty beats cancer testing."

They still don't get it, do they? They can't see we're aping them!

Evolution Of The Jet Ski

Darwin first tested his theory in a letter to a magazine ('Lookalike' letter points to similarity between man and ape.)