Science Show Host T-Shirts

When you think about it, you have to be a complete idiot not to believe aliens crashed at Roswell in 1947. It's clear we reverse-engineered their tech. Before 1947: Primitive cars, planes and radio. After 1947: Spaceships, quantum computing, internet. Let me try ... Before 1947: No bikinis. After 1947: Bikinis. No, wait ... the bikini was 1946. That throws this whole theory into question. We really should have our own science show.

Albert Einstein

'Teenagers!'

"Is it that bad?"

The Solar System (after deregulation)

Academic Jeopardy ... 'What Was the Maiden Name of Dante Alighieri's Maternal Grandmother?'

"Frankly, I can't wait until I evolve into a bird..."

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

Chemist builds animals instead of molecular models

She loves to play with string theory.

"You're calling it love, but it's really just static electricity."

The Origins of Everything

When bacteria trash talk to antibodies. Oh yeah?! You and what course of antibiotics?!

"It's just one monkey at one typewriter, but we've given him an infinite need for validation."

'OOO, I've thought of a new one! Two squiggles and a backwards G!'

"Professor, we need you to stop. The Student Union has decided that the earth is flat."

PET THEORIES

Senior Jeopardy!

"And now, speaking against the theory of evolution..."

Cell Bar & Grill. Happy Hour All Day. The new owner is an endorphin.

Dr. Saltine, pioneer of salt transplants.

How Glaciations Begin

'I wonder how Curious George fits into all this?'

"Pssst! - Gerald, you've mutated again. . ."

"See? A huge surge in all the major crowdfunding sites right before the Big Bang!"

'Since Fleming already beat you to it with penicillin, I take it we can dispose of your week-old sandwich?'

"And what qualifications do you bring to the table beyond being first in line?"

'There are two types of alchemy - there's organic and there's inorganic.'

The new Physics

"I'm sorry, sir, but I've got to ask you another question. I heard someone in the courtroom shout out the correct answer."

'In the alternate universe I've come up with, everything would be exactly the same except cats would bark.'

'Interesting article in Nature this week - apparently love's not a wave, it's a particle.'

They still don't get it, do they? They can't see we're aping them!

Evolution...the wifi rhino.

'A new musical - Einstein's quest - rehearsal'