Science Show Fan T-Shirts

Figures from 'Ascent of Man' diagram all do the Conga: 'Let's all fo the Conga, na-na-na-na ...'

Think Tank

"Fantastic! Do you realize what we've just stumbled upon? It's the fabled Lost Glove Compartment of the Ancient Astronauts!"

''Science moves but slowly, slowly, creeping on from point to point'. Tennyson.'

"Actually, not all roses are red. Sometimes they're white as well as numerous other colours. Also I think you'll find that violets are sort of purple..."

"No son of mine is going into entomology."

'Your test results are in - and here's a first, the Lab Techs have asked to meet you.'

"When you think about it, you have to be a complete idiot not to believe aliens crashed at Roswell in 1947." "Before 1947: primitive cars, planes, and radio. After 1947: space ships, quantum computing, internet." "Let me try... Before 1947: no bikinis. After 1947: bikinis." "No, wait... The bikini was 1946. That throws this whole theory into question." "We really should have our own science show."

"This is Matt with your five day forecast, on location."

"Some dinosaurs died out more quickly than others" "You want some?"

'He's making tremendous progress. last week he had three tails.'

"You've got to move. The bed is needed for another TV drama."

Just what is it that amoebas really want.

"So we've got the labcoats. Now we need a good excuse to wear them." The Birth of Science.

'I'm afraid our worst suspicions have been confirmed - we found slug, snail and a trace amount of puppydog tail.'

"She introduces herself as Drosophila Melanogaster, but everyone knows she's just a common fruit fly."

'More or less?'

Scientist with test tube.

"I'm trying to cross a hen with a dog. . .For pooched eggs."

Storm chaser van with satellite dish and Storm in a teacup chaser van with cup & spoon.

"Hey Neil, I've got an idea - let's really freak everyone out and tell them you're quitting physics to become my new co-Pope."

'And then when I push this button it magnetizes the ions and...'

Life in The Halfassic Age

"When I was young, we used bottles, rocks and toothpicks for our school science projects."

"My discovery may not win a Nobel prize, Edmund. . . but the world can always use a better tasting toothpaste!"

"But I digress..."