Science Jokesters Pillows

The Broken Clock That Is Wrong Twice A Day

Relativity explained; the woman on the train will always appear more attractive than the woman on the platform.

"Don't forget the nucleus has mass."

"Would you please step back to the machine while I make an adjustment?"

God not-too-happy with the Humans sticking a 'Closing DOWN Sale!' sign on planet Earth

"Just for fun today we could fire some eggs around."

"It's just one monkey at one typewriter, but we've given him an infinite need for validation."

"Are you sure this is a 'Flu virus?" "See for yourself...it's nose is running!"

'One placebo or two, doctor?'

Physics Improv. "I now vill be taking suggestions from ze audience..."

'I just evolved the opposable thumb, and I've already got carpal-tunnel syndrome!'

'Don't you hate it when they look BACK at you?'

The Uterus in the form of a Ewe

'By selective breeding over the course of 10,000 generations, we've managed to create the world's ugliest fruit fly!

'If you don't behave we'll unfreeze your stem cells!'

'But it may be easier to understand the meaning of bioengineered life.'

'Catch a pair of chimps and do a complete makeover on them.'

"Information is moved via neurotransmitters from neuron to neuron via the synapses into the brain where it is then retrieved by the memory via a slap on the back of the head."

'Lately, I've been thinking a lot about evolution. My theory is that it all points to 'survival of the fattest'.'

"Alarmingly, after five minutes the pool had come no closer."

"It's the formula for a black hole."

'Kleinzweck has a theory that the strong nuclear force is actually tiny rolls of duct tape.'

At first, Moses was worried about the manna from heaven.

There was a nasty bug going around.

'Reallly Miss Jones...all this fuss over a silly little spider!'

'What are you talking about? ? how can you have half a quantum theory?'

"Ah - The 'Big Gang' theory."

International Conference on Genetically Modified Crop Development.

"Enough helium makes laughing gas."

Cambridge Dons Researching Gravity.

Cloning...Oops! Oxelot.

"Oh our assistant, he was donated by a pharmaceutical company."

Grok's Black Hole Theory

Evolution...the decoy shark.

'At the moment, it's only weakness is flypaper.' - (spyplane research dept.)