Science Fiction Humorist Gifts

"How far does this bus go?"

'Mayday! Mayday! I'm in the drink!'

Mos Eisley Cowpat. You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villiany. We must be cautious!

"We don't get out much."

Close encounters of the turd kind...

'Houston, I'm prepared to land...'

'Teenagers!'

The Solar System (after deregulation)

"Frankly, I can't wait until I evolve into a bird..."

"Abduction 101, when abducting eggs from a primitive planet always lower the temperature in the ship!"

"Good Lord! Life on Mars...adorable life on Mars!"

Mister Bundles VS. The Martians - Party Twenty Three

C'mon, it'll be fun! I'll throw on some stars, pop in a few planets, drum up a life form or two, and this place will be hoppin'! The Big Shebang Theory.

God Sneezes Out Creation

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

The Food Chain

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

'You've orbited the Earth in a NASA spacecraft! Wow! Me, I've jumped over the Moon...'

Chemist builds animals instead of molecular models

'...heard the one about the Venusian, the Martian and the Saturnian?'

"Take me to your Larder!"

Star Wars vs Star Trek

Clown God

Man at penthouse party walks out onto terrace and is startled to see the Earth, instead of the moon, shining in the sky.

She loves to play with string theory.

"You're calling it love, but it's really just static electricity."

When Love In The Laboratory Turns Sour.

"It's just one monkey at one typewriter, but we've given him an infinite need for validation."

When bacteria trash talk to antibodies. Oh yeah?! You and what course of antibiotics?!

'OOO, I've thought of a new one! Two squiggles and a backwards G!'

"Professor, we need you to stop. The Student Union has decided that the earth is flat."

PET THEORIES

'Tell me this - did you have this condition before you sat in the jacuzzi for 100 million years?'

"Pssst! - Gerald, you've mutated again. . ."

How Glaciations Begin