Sci-fi Satirists Gifts

Alien of old timers.

'Take us to your lead.'

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

'I couldn't think of a science fair project so I just re-invented the wheel.'

"The following program was made possible by fluctuations in the random chaos of the Universe...."

"Up here, light is neither a particle nor a wave. It's a liquid."

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

"This may surprise some of your viewers, but I didn't actually want to go into the box."

"Do you remember when we used to put FOOD in food?"

'Still think nuclear testing is harmless?'

'Tell me this - did you have this condition before you sat in the jacuzzi for 100 million years?'

"And now, speaking against the theory of evolution..."

"The blood test will take a couple of days, but I'm pretty sure it's just ketchup."

"They've got me doing cosmetics research."

"I didn't invent the wheel. I invented the pizza."

"Every abductee gets a souvenir mug."

'Six years ago you received a complimentary set of steak knives. You thought they were free didn't you Jimmy?...'

Evolution Of The Jet Ski

"I'll tell you, mock jury duty beats cancer testing."

Govt. UK led by Seance

"Say, do you have time between all that DNA research to invent a non-smelly sock."

'Do you ever wonder if we'll evolve into creationists?'

Scientific Research: 'Uh...why'd it take'em 20 yeahs t' figyah that out?'

Taken genetic engineering too far

Escaping Black Hole - '..But captain that's the pensions black hole there is no escape!'

Reviewing a Scientific Paper - Etiquette for References.

If Sir Issac Newton and William Tell were brothers, gravity would never have been discovered.

"Send for a Prftgxrgplwtkn interpreter - case adjourned for a thousand light years."