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'Just be patient -- we'll land as soon as they push the immigration bill through.'

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

"I'm grounded. I forgot to delete the car's computer history after we did those crop circles on Earth."

"We've made great progress!"

...and then I...wait....What's that?? Whoa! We're on a spaceship! This is fun! Hey! What's this button do? Can I pull this lever? Are we there yet? Take a selfie with us? Do we get snacks? Can I drive? Are we there yet? Something we said? Just imagine if we'd been obnoxious!

"Don't worry, they normally look like little humans during the early scans."

Invasion Of The Summer Aliens

"Relax. I just had a vitamin."

Robotic Man

If time travel was invented in 1600 in England. I'm a fan of the bard. Let's see if he wants to take a journey through time. Globe Theater. Sounds fun! Let's go to 2020. It's a nice round number. Zazzz! Poof! That's weird. How did they know he was coming? And why does he need to leave this place? Apparently you can't be here, William. The sign says "No Shakespeare in the park this summer."

"Please ask your pet to kindly put down the weapon."

The Missing Sock Returns

The aliens froze, gripped by a primal fear. This time there would be no abduction.

"You left this on our ship."

Ascent of Machine.

"The space aliens who abducted me wanted to know what it was like to be loved...I wasted no time."

'He's been like this ever since he had his laser eye treatment.'

"Hey, remember a few days ago, when all this was unacceptable?"

"I brought back important data on that blue planet called Earth."

'Your videotape's intriguing - But it still doesn't prove that they really exist.'

Alien Snowmen

"Maybe we should have brought a Riesling."

dog vs UFO...

'I'd say it's six of one and one half doxen of the other.'

"Take me to your mechanic."

"I understand this diner has quite a reputation."

'Excuse me could you please direct me to the nearest toilet?'

Tarzan of the damn dirty apes.

"Sorry...but until we fix the cloaking device, this will have to do."

Friends and enemies of the Earth.

"I used to want to be an astronaut, but now I think I'd rather be a billionaire space tourist."

Super Strength, Impervious to Bullets And Explosions

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Time Machine Collision