Schoolyard Antics Admirer Pillows

"Let's see. ... We'll take Death."

"Have you been eating the paste again, Todd?"

Santa does a keg stand.

"Recess does things to a man."

'How do you like that? We just get through the alphabet and she starts hauling in the heavy artillery!'

It's all gravy.

It makes no sense. The number of books that can be stored on a small device is constantly increasing, yet school kids seem to be lugging around bigger backpacks every year!

"If it really is a smartphone, why are my grades still lousy?"

'Virgil is on the gymnastics team.'

Jesus as a child - 'Just look at my clean floor! What have I told you about walking on puddles?'

"Forget about eating homework, I need you to carry my backpack!"

'Yes, your son does ask questions in class but they're always 'Can I have the hall pass?'.'

As you like it - 'Is my wife at home?' ' Yes sir, and also your cousin'

'I've eaten so much homework that I'm starting to age in paper years.'

'You realize, don't you, that you are playing fast and loose with my self esteem?'

"Very effective talk on the power of non-verbal communication."

Teenage Vegetables

'I would appreciate it if you don't call out in class.'

A headmaster in the stocks covered in rotten eggs.

'I was hoping we'd worn that out.'

'Yes, I flunked history, but at least I now understand that quote, 'Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.''

Upon returning to school, none of the boys could help but notice how much Allison had developed over summer vacation.

'Well if you don't want to see me in here anymore, then tell the teachers to stop picking on my bad behaviour!'

"Stop saying, 'you do the math'. I flunked math!"

"I'm the acting superintendent. I oversee all the drama and theatre programs."

"Don't be fooled. He isn't a prince and he isn't you pal!"

I know you are, but what am I? Huh? Whatever you say bounces off me and sticks to you. I'm ready for the return of school. My mom says you're just jealous.

'Since when did we start getting report cards, too?'

'I took her to register in kindergarten, and they wanted a damage deposit.'

'I can confidently say that James will go down in history - and probably in maths and geography as well...'

"Sergio, you know I don't snoop...but I was in Baldo's room this morning...and I found this."

Student to mother: 'What a day. The health teacher left school sick, the debate team got expelled for fighting, the biology teacher dissected the school mascot, and the glee club, in general, went berserk.'

Test Tomorrow: No Books Or Apps - Just Bring Your Brain

"Can I help it if a Russian hacker broke in and changed all my A's to D's?"

Paul Revere circa 3rd grade.