School Tale Appreciator Gifts

'The bus driver makes your stomach upset? Tell me about it ... he's my husband.'

'Second grade. When did you discover 'LMNOP' wasn't one letter?'

"But honey. . . he's just not our kind!"

Nanki Poo

Ali Baba- Cover Design for Proposed Edition of The Forty Thieves

Jack and the Beanie stock.

"Math would have been a 'A' if you factor in the fudge factor. I got caught fudging on the final."

Alice Through the Looking Glass - The Walrus and Carpenter.

'Yep, I did eat his homework, but he begged me to.'

'Can we postpone this? I'm out of lighter fluid.'

William Tell (alternate)

'I do know the capital of France. It's the letter 'F'!'

'I did have an eventful day at school, but nothing, in my opinion, to write home about.'

Cutting Down Trees to Build the Ark

Teacher to parents: 'Ah - you're right. What do I know about kids? My biological clock went coo-coo years ago.'

'Ready for your performance review?'

"Who'd like to start today's show and tell?"

'This note from your teacher says you're doing great for a six year old. Doesn't she know you're fifteen?'

Tosca discovers Mario Cavaradossi is stabbed

I WILL NOT COMMENT ON MS. STEMPEL'S WART

'Actually I was hoping to meet a knight in shining armour!'

'Tonight there's a small, select meeting of the P.T.A - just you, me and the Head!'

"If you kiss me I turn into a prince and if you lick him, well, you can’t really be hallucinating more than you are already."

'I don't think your taking this seriously boy.'

"I stood up to the class bully like you said, Dad. . . then she punched me in the eye!"

Teacher to parent: 'He's been transferred from Detention to a Minimum Security Facility.'

"Nora, do you ever think about the future?"

'Give up smoking? Why?'

'I won the garlic eating competition.'

School Inspector

"So you spilled your soda, big deal!"

Trilby - 'Et maintenant dors, ma mignonne!'