School Party T-Shirts

'Smashing party, Miss - can we have another one tomorrow?'

"A student skipped a model U.N. meeting – now he's claiming diplomatic immunity."

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown and Jill said 'I told you so'."

'He made an excellent jelly.'

Yearbook

My belief is if you're old enough to take texts, counter-texts, and meta-texts in Western Philosophy, you should be old enough to drink.

Face painting by numbers.

'No. The television screen hasn't gone red - You've got tomato ketchup all over your glasses!'

"Damn! I'm in the wrong fairy tale. This is the three little pig's house, not the three bear's!"

Paul goes home for the holidays

Children's Party

'You must be Jimmy's father . . .'

"Kid gloves, Hernandez. You gotta use kid gloves!"

Baxter Higgleton, word balloon artist.

"Mom, can you come get me?"

'Sorry I'm late - I was stacked up at the airport.'

"It turns out I just wasted the whole morning networking with a dog."

Now I'll open up the floor to questions and batsh*t crazy rants.

"The wifi password? Of course Madame, it's 'Ilove100boobies69'."

King of Music.

"Car accident? No, I volunteered to hold the rope for the pinata at my son's birthday party!"

'That's the last time I ask you to tie my shoe laces!'

LEMONADE, 'Actually, I hate places like this.'

'I just wish that meant getting ready for the prom instead of the NCAA basketball tournament.'

To save some cash my parents held my 8th B'day party at Lenny's Tap + Grill....

"Do that again, but cuter."

The Amazing Mr Sausage

'It was an exciting party, especially when the firemen came to put out the fire!'

'In a slight change to the programme, the second year jazz quartet aren't playing 'Hello Dolly'. They are however playing truant!'

Once Again Jeff Had Put Too Much Helium In The Party Balloons.

'I hate it when he has friends around'.

Science fair judge sees flower pot broken on floor near sign saying 'gravity'.