School Humor Fan Gifts

'And then I just hit delete. I haven't actually eaten any homework in years.'

'I wish you would come to me first with your grievances, instead of going directly to the United Nations Committee on Human Rights.'

Li'l Bill meets destiny.

In A Just World

'I'll need a note from the aliens who abducted you to excuse your absence.'

"Exactly how long were you home schooled?"

"I turned five. That's why I'm here. What are you in for?"

'Alright children, you may remove your blindfolds...we're there.'

Principal sees a sign on faculty room: Happy Hour 3:00 - 4:30.

'Very funny, William. Take it off! You're scaring the other students.'

'These reading glasses don't work. I got a C in Reading Comprehension.'

"They go to a private school."

"Let's just say my teacher and I agreed to disagree."

"Yes, Eric you do need to do a duty. You know as well as I do that every dog has its day."

"You boys! Stop using parliamentary language in the playground!"

'Ok, who threw that?'

"He's at that awkward age when he tells his teachers valuable information about his parents."

"It's the school run."

"I think those are just to keep the teachers from leaving."

Teacher - "I'm a fast track high flyer. I don't have time to explain.."

'Truth is, kids, I ate your homework.'

'I finally got a good one!'

Hollywood High School Math Department.

Fish in school to other fish: 'I did well in marine biology today - it was an open-brook test.'

It could be worse -- there could be 35 teachers for every student

"It wasn't me... I'm the designated Patsy."

"Now, can somebody tell me the answer to this problem?"

"I had that nightmare again where I get eaten by a dog!"

"Can someone give me an example of something silly?"

"One day, my teacher went in there and never came back out."

"Check it out. I'm exploring the fine line between a look of intense concentration and my usual resting dumb face."

"No, you don't get overtime for staying after school for detention."

"Well, you passed some of the tests, but you failed others. I'm afraid you'll have to repeat grade 8."

'The ate my allegation of improper conduct against you, Sir.'

"I know your dad's a hedge fund manager, Amber, but you don't need a bigger piece of paper to draw a picture of your house."