School Dynamics Buff Gifts

"That's why this is a middle school. We're always stuck between the parents and the administration."

"Another job well done by your conflict resolution specialist."

"Now the geeks hold all the power. They're the ones who know how to forge a parent's e-signature."

"Right...you're all in detention until we find out who put the chameleon on the tartan rug!"

"I wish every teacher came with a warning label."

I will not waste chalk kid...

PTA Meeting Tonight: Parents,Teachers,Attorneys

Soccer Moms

"I'm putting your math homework in your blue folder – don’t eat it!"

"Take a few minutes to introduce yourself, Ms. Berry. Not that they don't already have you pegged."

'I think I've spotted our problem.' (too many consultants)

'Don't look at this as a demotion, look at it as the stripping away of your last shred of dignity.'

'Well. . . she's exceptionally distracted.'

'We are looking for highly motivated, confident decisions makers for headships. Is your son such a man, Mrs Smikins?'

"Since I'm your favorite student, do I even have to take this test?"

"I'm used to dealing with grievances. I've been married for 30 years."

The Kavec Corp - A wholly owned (but nevertheless on good terms with) subsidiary of T4 industries.

'Try to forget that I'm your boss, Saunders and just try to think of me as one of the boys!'

'I, too, didn't think cats ate homework.'

'It's the boss' attempt to convey a certain openness'

Dept. of Transportation. City Streets. We're going to have to let you go --- You're intelligent enough, but you lack street smarts.

"That's against the rules...."

"Who'd like to go first?"

I've created a new policy that is both arbitrary and inconsistent.

"'C-minus'? -- I'd like to speak to your supervisor!"

Never declare a food fight on artichoke day!

Right where I want them...

'Since when did we start getting report cards, too?'

"I don't get it! Why do Young Master have to go to school for years? I learnt everything I needed to know from my mum in a few months. . ."

In the final days of summer vacation, teachers make their critical student trades.

'Yes, I received the review copy of 'Running a School is a Snap' that you sent. I found it to be a very useful book.'

'Well, this isn't what I understood by a job share, either.'

It's good to expand successful schools, but isn't there a danger of over-extending the catchment area.

'We're no longer called 'Children', we're called 'Age Disadvantaged'!'

'I know you're on drugs boy. You've been seen with the supply teacher.'