School Day Gifts

I drive, therefore I am.

Kid at bus stop to kid: 'Needless to say, I cured my Mom of her home-schooling kick.'

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

My First Camera

'X is unknown? Even to somebody with all your education?'

"I did the best dental health poster in the class. I just hope Mr. Tooth Decay doesn't hold a grudge."

'Well, Tommy, you've grown a foot since the last time I saw you!'

I'm Bored With Educational Toys

"So, what's gonna be your favorite class?"

Today we learned to count to one.

"I know! I know! I K-n-o-w!. . . Um, what was the question?"

Late/Too Late.

'Wow! That's some growth spurt!'

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, Kevin. You need to know them so you can Blog.'

"I lost my taste for his homework when it came burned on a CD."

Hansel and Gretel Day School.

"You're never a superhero in your own backyard."

"Do you think that will count as our 'Fifteen minutes of fame'?"

'I'd like to challenge the test.'

"The day at school? Oh, you know, the usual psychological and educational stew."

'I don't like the sound of the engine.'

'A dog ate my homework.'

'Yes, grammar rules do evolve over time, but making up your own to 'stay ahead of the curve' won't work in this English class!'

"I'm doing whatever I feel like doing, before I reach the age of accountability."

'Is THIS the way you plan to spend your peak learning years?'

"It's a mobile."

"I'm Albert, your new mathematics teacher, but you can call me Al."

Caution May Contain Nuts.

"We thought this was more realistic."

"I thought your show-and-tell was really brave."

"Today in school we learned how to glue!"

WELCOME TO KINDERGARTEN! "It was mostly okay, but there's way too much micromanagement!"

"It's going to be one of those days."

"If you find authority intolerable, remember, you're in good company."

"I have a feeling this is gonna be one tough course."