School Conference Gifts

Parent Involvement Tip #1

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

Academic Idol - 'Professor Johannsen's paper was zippy. It had robust vocabulary and I almost felt that I could dance to it. I would give it a 7.'

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

Business meeting, CEO is dressed strangely as he asks: 'Any questions?'

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

"I wasn't the smartest guy in the room, but I was the loudest."

"A student skipped a model U.N. meeting – now he's claiming diplomatic immunity."

'The Board has chosen you to handle the restructuring because you have no heart.'

Inclusive speech

Billy, can you deliver your show 'n tell this time without the fog machine?

The interested bystanders.

"Nervous about this morning's presentation?"

"Fantastic presentation! All of the investors loved it."

"Is it just a scary coincidence that the words 'changes' and 'unknown' both have 7 letters?"

Need Supercomputer to finish my PhD, Please Help.

'Wake me up when he doesn't use a buzzword.'

'Complete sentences?? Jeez, how verbose can you get?'

'...and now, Gentlemen, we come to our final lecture in advanced cardiology...'

"In economics, I got an IOU."

"He thought this would illustrate the company hierarchy more clearly than the organizational chart."

"I understand the revisionists are hot on your trail, Professor Delauney."

"As you can see, sales have been a little erratic lately..."

"I suggest we start with the low hanging fruit."

"That concludes my presentation on popular music and alternative energy."

Something tells me it's not going to be a good school report!

"I love these off-site business meetings."

'Well ladies and gentlemen, I'm sure my little talk has made you all think'

"Now this chart should clear up any confusion you have with the report."

"I don't think the guy with the business-card cannon has ever been to an actual networking event,"

'Our goal is to stress di-versity while remaining a uni-versity.'

'Unaccustomed as I am to public speaking...'

"We serve danishes because that's just how I roll!"