School Aficionados Gifts

'I had a good share and tell, Ms. Gibbs, but my family made me sign a confidentiality agreement.'

"It's Billy's teacher. She's just calling to say how much she detests him."

"There's something weird about Emily. She actually likes school!"

"I really love school. There's only one problem. I think not having a college degree is holding me back."

"I figure I have about 20 years of school to go."

School. I like solving problems with X's and Y's, so I'll probably go into either math or genetics!

Ten Years to get the Ph.D

"It's Labor Day! The unofficial last day of summer!"

"But why can't I bring him to class? He's my therapy toad!"

"If you find authority intolerable, remember, you're in good company."

"Finally...school starts next week."

"If we only use 10% of our brains, how am I supposed to get passing grades?"

Well, wish me luck. Mom and dad can handle an 'A' and two 'B's, but I've REAL-L-L-L-Y got to spin the 'D' in math!

"Get real Dad, those are LAST years colors!"

'I work at a school's Lost Property Office: I track down the owners of lost items...'

"Today in school we learned how to text our names."

'Today in school, we learned how to count to one.'

'Are you sure I should read my book report to the class? --�It's PG-13.'

"Timmy, thank you for your science report..."Yawning is Contagious.'"

"I can't believe school ends in three months! Sometimes I wish it would never end. But I guess endings make you appreciate the present."

'You've spent the last 20 years in college. What made you stop hiding from the real world?'

'What I don't understand, is how a guy named Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart stayed out of fights long enough to compose any music.'

"It's a deal, I trade you two of your lunchroom duties if you take my field trip duty?"

Classroom.

"I knew there'd be pitfalls when I became a teacher, but thirty to a classroom is too many."

'I'm getting a little concerned about Timmy. He hasn't wormed his way out of anything all semester.'

"You're a very good hall monitor, Billy, but we don't detain teachers."

Did I cheat? You're not wearing a wire, are you?

'I'd like to run for class president but I don't want to put my family through a background check.'

'I understand the school has a policy of promoting from within, so I'd like to be considered for your job when you retire.'

'Dad...why would I ever want to get out of the first grade? I love first grade!'

"Should we really be starting a new unit so close to summer vacation?"

"We just want you to know that wherever you wind up going to college is fine with us, as long as it's someplace we can brag about to our friends."

"I love school! Today, I passed out new books...I passed out tests...I passed out homework assignments."

"I know this is third grade and you're in charge. . . but where's the oversight?"