Scarecrow Satirist Gifts

"Oh no. Not the niblets."

"It turns out crows find a bunch of dead crows more frightening than a man made out of hay."

'Because the horned one commands them to, that's how!'

No, I don

Scarecrows guarding a field

'We're cutting you some slack because you just died but normally we frown on devil's food.'

"You know, he's not nearly as scary close up!"

Wow, what a scarecrow! Oh yes, the crows are even returning the seed they stole yesterday.

The Lavender Dot - Part Five

"Do you recognize the one who stole your tractor?"

"His baldness was way out of control, so we had to put him into a medically induced comb-over."

'Looks like you've got enough fiber in your system.'

'Easiest job I've ever had: Farmer Jones is paying me $5 an hour to be a scarecrow...'

Heaven's Cattlegrid.

'The infrared reading is negative: It's only a scarecrow... Let's go...'

"I miss the scarecrow."

'After the wizard gave me the brain,of course, I felt like I should use it.'

They locked eyes. The tension between them – deliberate. All of which made the crows very uncomfortable.

"Here come the suits."

Scary Scarecrow

Man halfway through growing a scarecrow

'It's bad news I'm afraid,we're asprins'

'We'll leave the corn alone if you never tell that dumb story about Dorothy and Toto again.'

Center for anti-discrimination.

Production in times of pandemic

Advertising meets cryptozoology...

"I just washed and waxed it. I don't want the birds messing it up!"

'Look out, here comes that scarey farmer.'

'Hell? No. We're just the side effects of your new drugs.'

'I'm Dr. Pooches and I'll be your den...Oh, boy.'

'You'll have to do something about your squirrel chasing dogs in the park. It doesn't look right.'

'Dang, just another scarecrow.'

Boss, if you could be any superhero, which one would it be? Insurance-Adjuster-Man. In a world where superheroes were real, there'd be an awful lot of collateral damage to buildings and infrastructure. Insurance-Adjuster-Man would probably clear six figures by breakfast. "Heroes" aren't in it for the money. Of course they are. Take Lex Luthor, for instance ...

Full Harvest Moon

A Fox Hunter gets Angry with a Scarecrow.