Scale Shifter Gifts

Infinity Miniature Man.

"If you could be any Bob Dylan you wanted to, which Bob Dylan would you be?"

"Even if forced to slave all day, in my mind I'll always play!"

'Nothing impacts my lifestyle choices more than a veterinarian with a scale.'

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

'I know we're inchworms, but let's get into the spirit of this! Change is good!'

"Have you ever thought of just knocking this 'half-empty glass' OFF the counter?"

"...And I like how you switched from the first person narrative to third person—impressive." "Thanks."

"Hold on, hun... I'm just saying, losing four ounces in a month is better than gaining four ounces in a month!"

Pessimists v Optimists.

Woman weighing herself while holding balloons

"Actually, the job calls for someone who is convex."

"Double whammy. My weight now exceeds my credit score."

Kids really do make you view the world from a different perspective...I'm on the floor, behind the couch, under the bed...

Scales

Joe's Weight Gain: 'Hey, Victoria...I like this diet you told me about yesterday...I just lost 2 more while we've been talking.'

Fat man on scales.

"Let's change table stakes to vacation days."

'Will we ever get a morning-after pill for over-eating?'

Sphere vs. sphere reimagined.

"I gained 10 pounds? I've brought my own bathroom scale for a second opinion."

Cathy decides to remain standing on the scale until she loses weight.

'I'm afraid I can't accept that excuse Mrs Hart. It isn't possible to inhale second hand calories.'

'OMG Roger, you look totally out of shape!'

Paul was certain he had the largest pumpkin, until he discovered he was the smallest man.

On the Hanger

Fat lady standing on a weighing machine. Its print out says 'I Quit!'.

I only weigh 95 kilograms...That's 210...in pounds!

'The other foot also Mrs Zipsky!'

"We're looking toward the Paci?c Rim, Green?eld. What the hell are you doing?"