Scale Shenanigans Gifts

'We've got it narrowed down to between three and twenty-three pounds.'

'I demand a second opinion!'

'We're just like family. Stop mumbling, Cindy. Straighten up, Fred. Get that hair out of your eyes, Janet...'

'She'll never look for me here.'

"Mum, I got the job!"

The Frankenstein snowman.

'I think my diet is finally working. went form a large to an extra medium.'

I was hoping you might convince him by demonstrating the quality of the product.

"Forget about eating homework, I need you to carry my backpack!"

"Done Dad! I've hacked the dog's social media account and flooded it and his contacts with links to cat videos..."

STRIP "Looks like the escalators on the blink again"

Fisherman catches swimmer.

'I see a VERY important note from your doctor. Unfortunately, I can't read her handwriting.'

'All the fourth grade guys took a blood oath not to learn anything during the summer.'

"And you say you've been erect for over 4 hours?"

The invention of baseball.

"Ms. Thomas, you'll have to come pick up your son. He's swinging from the chandelier claiming that he can and will divide by zero."

'It's crazy what a peep will eat.'

'Could you help me? My parents are lost.'

'Grab the wand! Grab the wand!'

'I got caught cribbing from Charley Jones' laptop!'

"Holy cow! I've gained eight pounds!"

'Is it my fault the supermarket trolley had a mind of its own?'

"You might fake an illness at home, but here, only a fever makes her a believer."

'Hot! Hot!'

Diet Tips Number 1

'Isn't it amazing how we can fall asleep standing?'

Football ground toilets include one for mascots.

Lots of people helping out with the self-service machine.

Man riding a fish

'No Billy! I am not ready to see you yet!'

Boy shouting at and frightening an old lady

"Stealing office supplies, eh? I'm in for murder one!"