Scale Operator Pillows

'Arrgh! Two fat ladies!'

Critisize your weight.

"Yes, if that towel weighs 25 lbs that would explain the reading."

"I don’t care that muscle weighs more than fat. I only know I work out here and gain 5 pounds!"

What your guitar says about you.

Paul was certain he had the largest pumpkin, until he discovered he was the smallest man.

'Well, if I weigh that much after only putting one foot on, I don't think I have the courage to continue!'

'Sorry, sweetie, but your weight is still the same.'

Woman stands on scales, holds bunch of balloons.

"I have to go on a diet! According to that fisherman I have gained fifty pounds overnight!!"

Woman and sport trainer

Lady Justice using metric scales.

Woman weighing herself sitting on a chair.

'Well, we couldn't store all the corn.'

Woman holding two phones together.

Woman on scales.

Woman strips on a public scale in order to get a lower reading.

'When did these start coming with privacy protection?'

'Doris, I know how much you weigh. Step on the scale and I'll hand you the fish.'

'Whaddya mean the scale keeps flashing tilt?'

My diet is working! I'm almost down to what I didn't want to get up to!

Mouse/Rat on weighing machine: 'I squeak your weight.'

'Thank you. It took me a long time, but I built it to scale.'

"Patience - we have to wait till the dial stops spinning."

Fat lady standing on a weighing machine. It's print out says 'I Quit!'.

'Of course you realize my gold crown adds a lot to my weight.'

BUS, 'I never have to take Muriel out to dinner any more -- I got a remote tuner for the bathroom scales.'

Gigantic bird or tiny balloon?

'Yes, Operator, I'm holding.'

'What about your underwear? That must weigh a pound or two.'

'Aack! Four star guilt!!'

Crater Lake

I want you to assess your own abilities on a scale of one to ten, - 'Okay,' - 'Intelligence,' - 'Five,' - 'Confidence' - 'Five,' - 'Social Skills' - 'Five,' - 'Why do you think you've rated them all as five' - 'I forgot to ask if ten was good or bad,'

Woman puts baloons to make herself appear lighter on weighing scale.

Giant woman.