Sausage Dog Devotee Gifts

'My wife and I just bought a dachshund.'

If you bathe a skunk in tomato juice, it will smell like a dog. A bird in the hand is better than two in your shorts. Never wear aqua after Thanksgiving. Unconventional wisdom.

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

"Foster failure"

Licensed Therapist

Caveman's dog with head outside car window.

Now, let's not be hasty! They may look the same, but we are both duty bound to fetch our own master's ball...

'Yessir, Ben us fly fisherman answer to a higher calling.'

"Live in the sunshine, swim in the sea, drink in the wild air." — Ralph Waldo Emerson "Catch tennis balls in the mouth." — Me

Canine Companion

Love a Mutt

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

Updated Nursery Rhyme #27.

"And for lot 27 we have another old tennis ball."

"When I first arrived, Young Master was always with me and Old Master didn't want anything to do with me, nor it's the opposite: Go figure..."

" 'Grrr' is not a word."

Happy.

'I know you're worried about Tibby, Mrs. Lutz, but we simply don't allow people to stay overnight with their pets.'

Pet a Puppy

'That large, rolled up newspaper is a reminder - mess up in this office and you'll pay the price.'

A woman with a dog and a baby on a leash

'Fetching is a good thing...but there can be TOO MUCH of a good thing.'

'Bloody favouritism I call it.'

'Why Sally, you look so fetching with that stick!'

"A little help, please."

'Satchel, I have just had a revelation.'

"We need volunteers for the car chasing fundraiser."

'Of course I'm being catty. How else do you expect me to act?'

No Soliciting

"Do you recall the exact moment the balance of power shifted?"

"Lenny?" "Darrell?"

Super pets.

"I cook the sausages in French mineral water, I wear a French beret and I can call you 'Monsieur'."

"He's already getting attached to you."

"Did you get my tweet?"