Satirical Space Explorer Gifts

Moon Vacuuming

"Good Lord! Life on Mars...adorable life on Mars!"

Man, my cat sneaks into the weirdest spots.

Save Our Universe

"The universe is expanding! Of course I'm expanding too!"

'...it's some distance away - but there are lots of 'em and they're edible.'

Astronaut: Pay and Display Only

Cosmonaughty

Smokers smoking on the moon, Astronauts smoking on the moon

Control Center. A satellite is falling! Tell NASA to divert it so it doesn't hit North Africa. Good golly, Miss Mali!

". . . And how long have you felt alienated?"

"Most of our procedures are out of network."

Moon's Portaloo.

ACME, Inc. For the man who has everything. It's a home security company.

Black Hole Corks

'OK, who stuck that wedding confetti star on it?'

The Moon Falls Out of the Sky.

"What's wrong with this telescope? I can't see a blasted thing."

"Yes. I'm 100% sure it's your turn for a moonwalk."

After our sun sheds the last of its energy and collapses in on itself... ...after the solar systems degraded, their planets flung out and consumed... And after those billions of stars in their billions of galaxies are all slowly snuffed out one by one... ...and after the last of the supermassive black holes evaporates... A single last question will remain, drifting through the long, cosmic dark... To renew your universe, please update your payment details.

Stand up comedians from outer space.

Search for Extraterrestrial Life. Ernie is working on a theory that alien life forms avoid the Milky Way galaxy because they're lactose intolerant.

'Russian scientists have determined where the meteorite than injured 1000 people came from. Thet say, 'It's not from around here.''

"The planet appears to be inhabitable but more like low-income inhabitable."

'Mars will have an oxygen atmosphere within six months. We just sent a payload of Kudzu there.'

"Houston....I've found the 'Plank Constant'."

'Deploy the Candarm and ready the Canafinger.'

"What do you use to relieve the burning and itching of asteroids?"

Unaware of the importance of dryer sheets, the crew of the starship enterprise embarrassingly warp through space with static Klingons.

The James Webb telescope is going to change everything. How so, cretinous oaf? It's going to let us see much farther into deep space than ever before. And the farther we see, the further back in time we're seeing. Do you understand what this means, Sadie? I don't have all day. Get to the point dweeb! It means we'll see the earliest stars and galaxies there ever were. We may even see all the way back to the Big Bang itself. We'll finally know for certain whether it was you. Busted. That singulari

"Sorry, professor... A black hole sucked in my homework!"

'Sorry folks, Tractor Beam's broken. We'll have to use a tractor piece of rope.'

"Captain...I'm detecting Hemorrhoids off our starboard bow."

'I come from. . . URANUS!'

NASA HEADQUARTERS, ACME VACUUM CLEANERS, 'Hi! - I understand that space is full of junk?'