Satirical Sensei Gifts

"One of you will unfriend me."

'Excuse me young man, you are sleeping on a very rare collectible.'

Think Outside The Box: Sure - but just not outside my pay grade - okay?

"This call may be recorded, set to music, and released on our own label, where we retain all rights. How can I help you today?"

"In my opinion we should lift the lockdown now... before the pandemic is over."

British savings accounts

Rich man vomiting euros to a beggar.

A man peddles U.S. flags on the sidewalk, next to a man peddling copies of the U.S. constitution

"And on the eighth day, God sat back with a scotch and soda and waited for the critical reviews."

"What colour do you have to get before the big kids leave you alone?"

Even more of what people say (and what they really mean)

Illogic Tree

'It's not what you think. It's not about our liberation.'

"Elon Musk is buying rope and walnuts."

'You say it's a dramedy? We thought it was more of a coma.'

Justice

Donald Glover

"It's a sequel to 'The Thinker'. It's 'The Blamer.'"

The 11th Commandment

Sermon - why our religion is really better than yours.

Greek Tragedy: 'Yes... we agree to further cuts in government spendings..!!!'

Manspreading in Art

Hades Movie Awards After Show. The dealy sins were all here -- They love walking the red carpet! Pride won tonight for a leading role and envy won for a supporting role. Wrath was seen yelling at at the paparazzi ... Lust tried to meet beautiful actresses ... and Gluttony rushed off to the buffet. Greed is already counting all the money he'll make because he won an award. And when sloth won, he received the night's biggest ovation ... because he was too lazy to give an acceptance speech!

How To Cut The Defense Budget

God finger

"The boss says he has an open door policy."

Mr. Cranky Pants Plants A Garden Part 2

VACCINATION REFUSAL

"I'm going to use Aversion Therapy. Get better or pay me $300 an hour."

"You know the rules, if you can't pay my fee I shall have to eat you."

'Yes, they've kept it pretty close to the book.'

"Father Fondell. . . your confessional is ready."

"All I'm saying is that you'd sell a lot more if you had Mary on the cover."

'Your honor, my client only broke into the museum because he had an art attack.'

Just what were you doing in Georgia anyways Hmmm Isn't it true that you were lookin' for a soul to steal Your confession states that you were in a bind cause you were way behind, Care to elaborate, Mr, Seacrest I mean, Lucifer,,