Satirical Jewelry Lover T-Shirts

Woman wearing testicles as earrings after husbands vasectomy.

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

Life Store Guide: Make-up and jewellery

'Go ahead and laugh, but I lose my keys less frequently than you do.'

Venn Diagram: DIamonds

"And if that diamond ring don’t shine, Poppa will probably take it back to 47th Street and get something for your mother."

A Zircon Is Forever

'I want to finish with him, but I'll have to wait until he's made the final payment on my engagement ring.'

'Ouwth! Bid my tong!'

'We would like to buy three rings... Engagement, wedding and teething!'

'Good morning pumpkin.' 'Good morning treasure.' A pile of treasure saying 'good morning' to a pumpkin

Lots of shiny glass objects! Darling, you're spoiling me!

Jewellers - "If you really love your wife to be, then money should be no object."

Cow and Milk

'...And this one comes with a magnifying glass so she can show it off to her friends.'

Posh Easter Egg

"Next time you meet me dressed as a giant boy, it's going to cost you a pair of diamond earrings."

"Jewelry store, visit our ATM."

The stone is semi-precious, so I got you two.

Dolly Varden - 'The Laughing Dolly'

Do you like my bling?

I think I have a gilt complex.

"So I gave her the 2-diamond love-and-BFFF ring and she grave me a big kiss, sold it, and went on a cruise. That's bad, right?!"

Jewelry Store Has Rings For Every Type of Relationship

"They were all out of rings, so I got you a watch."

On the fifth day, Neville opts for jewelry.

'Louise, everyone is wearing that this year ... don't be such a sheep to fashion.'

Ali Baba- Cover Design for Proposed Edition of The Forty Thieves

Unbeknownst to Charlene, the new earrings that Burt gave her were actually bass lures.

"We're going out -- of course I'm wearing my pearls."

"I need something that says ‘You were right about Trump.’"

The Blings - collectors of jewelry.

'I hope you don't mind, dear — I got my ears pierced.'

"Oh crap, my mood ring!"

"We scarf. We bracelet. We earring. We brooch. In brief, ladies, we accessorize."