Satirical Cartoon Admirers Pillows

"Give him a chance, I say. I mean what the hell is a hundred days?"

The Odyssey.

'Vote Cameron, get Brussels.'

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

Lesser known greek gods,

"The article you sent me on how technology causes stress crashed my computer."

'It's a boy. He's healthy and coming along fine, but he may be a little crnkt at birth owing to his claustrophobia. He will have feminine tendencies but is not actually gay. In fact, he'll eventually develop a taste for hard liquor and trashy women...'

"How long before the clinical trials are over?"

"My dream is to have a little house and a white picket fence wired with explosives."

Penguin

T-Rex Game of Choice - Ping Pong

Technique #54 airlines are adopting for handling excessive carry on luggage.

'It's one of our new technology rings, it allows you to download karats.'

'It's the moral highground occupation force.'

"We didn’t have enough in the budget to replace you with a real robot."

"My Weight Watchers meeting's tonight. I'd better get inside."

"Consumer confidence remains high as long as we keep them distracted buying stuff."

'That's what I like about you Roberts, you're not afraid to get out there and take a risk.'

IRS: The country is broke, but your taxes cannot be construed as 'Charity to the Poor'.

"He's been downgraded to a Category One."

"You should run for president."

Footing The Bill

'Someday I'm going to tell you all of the things I've done right.'

God Bless America, God Help Syria

Attorney At Law: Today's special - Bankruptcy and Divorce. Two for the price of one.

'I'm afraid there's been a 23% cut in the 'empathy and compassion' budget so you'll have to tell him to sod off now!'

"You'll go far...you think like a man..."

'You may have an adverse reaction when I administer this. It's your medical bill.'

'Remember Jones, your organs are worth more to us than your intellectual property.'

'There he goes over the bag limit again!'

"But I don't have any wishes related to food or squirrels."

'There's a conglomerate of malcontents here to see you, sir.'

Hello City Pound? Please take my dog away.

'Relax, he is just playing fetch the stick with the kids.'

'Mr. Putin, annexation of Crimea was nice, but wouldn't Ukraine, Lithuania, Estonia, and Latvia also be nice addictions to your Empire?'