Satellite Operator Gifts

'Ok, hon, I'm on Google Earth now... I see a parking sport!'

'Sorry, Big Guy, We're downsizing, Here comes your replacement,'

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

Atomic Bear: Part 22

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

"I see the downsizing continues."

Birds sitting on satellite dish.

'Don't ask questions, Ralph, just tell me who you'd rather look like - Sean Connery or Robert Redford.'

'Warning: Use of oversized apertures or antennas will void warranty,'

Trojan horse with a satellite dish.

"Oh...Hi Bob, listen buddy, I'm in a meeting right now, I'll Caw you back."

Satellite Discovers Sell-by-Date on Planet Earth

"I'll check and see if he's available."

"We seem to be going round in circles!"

Thermidor Dali

"And His Majesty sends you a great big kiss, too."

Welcome to Yellow Pages, Vermont

"I'm away from my desk or on another line. Please leave a message at the sound of my impersonation of a beep."

"Please stay on the line – your caul is important to us."

Spy Satellite

Control Center. A satellite is falling! Tell NASA to divert it so it doesn't hit North Africa. Good golly, Miss Mali!

"Earthlings."

"Of course it sends your message digitally. If you want analogue we'll have to saddle up old Bessie."

The Great Canadian Novel

'Don't call us, we'll call you, inc,'

"This is a computer speaking. I will now misconnect you and your party."

"This is Matt with your five day forecast, on location."

"Your call is important to us. Your estimated wait time is less than five hours."

'Your call is very important to us, so please continue to hold.'

For eons she lulled us into complacency with her whole orbiting satellite shtick... then, when we least expected it, the moon attacked.

"If you're annoyed by answering machines, press 1. . ."

Soon The Moon Will Have Cellphone Reception Better Than That One Part Of Your Commute

How M2M really works.

Nano-Satellite Assembly Line.

"Apparently it's demanding offerings."