Sapiosexuals T-Shirts

"Handsome isn't he? And I've heard he's the Head Bed Bug in a five-star hotel too..."

Coronavirus Sisyphys

'It must be good chocolate for six bucks a box.'

Sisyphus Sawyer

"I don't want to be alone when I'm old, either, so when we're old let's get back in touch."

'What do you mean, 'act my age'?... If I did that I'd be dead!'

"It would help if you brown-nosed a little more."

Eastenders: This Programme Contains Bad Acting And One-Dimensional Characterisation

Joan was a true believer in Astrology. However, this was the first time she had come face to face with a real member of the Zodiac... a giant scorpio!

'Forget it, they're gay.'

Always right.

"No. You can't move back in."

A man pushes a glitterball up a mountain

Sado-masochists reading in bed.

Prison ain't so bad- ? -aside from all the metrosexual activity.

"You may think you look cool, but can you actually breathe properly with that stupid cap on?"

"I called shotgun."

"You have no idea what I've been through."

"This government expects workers to make personal sacrifices during these difficult economic times..."

"Try to keep your bread and butter personality at the party. You're so sour in your dill moments."

'Alice, you ... you haven't changed a bit!"

A beginner's guide to being a sociopath

Flu.

I like a screw-cap for the convenience, but I like a cork for

GOD BLESS OUR UNDISCLOSED LOCATION.

'I wonder what kind of welcome we'll get on this planet!?' (mobile phone-shaped aliens).

Scorpio/scorpion

"How am I supposed to know whether I'm guilty or not? - I'm a sociopath!"

Let your people go? - and mess up my whole affirmative action program?

"My little Johnny stays with his dad at weekends."

A Fact.

"If it cheers you up, everyone's in lockdown."

'Oh dear. And who have you been differing with today?'

'The computer's running on at the mouth again.'

A snake labelled 'corruption' squeezes Russia to death