Salary Gladiator Pillows

"So that's a 'No' to a rise then?"

Rage.

I only root so hard for my time because I hate your team so much.

"Good news...I found a doctor who says you can still play!"

"This is a test. This is only a test. IF this had been the real world it'd be your job you'd be fighting for, not a letter of the alphabet."

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

American Football.

This castle manager job better be for real.

Football.

'So...worked in 'IT' long?'

'I've decided to skip my senior year and go directly into an endless cycle of unrealistic expectations and failure.'

Hear me, Graduates!

Punishment for the kicker.

'On the other hand, if I never finish anything I can't be a complete failure...'

"It was your father's idea - He can't bear to miss a second of the game."

The Thurston State Hornets make their entry onto the field.

'Get out there, Holmes, and pile on!'

'Quit whining, Sid, and walk it off! I'm not falling for that pulled muscle thing again!'

'He has some unresolved issues.'

A football player accidentally kicks off the head of another football player.

'He intentionally entangles his face mask in my hand!'

"Well, dad. . . when I was a kid I got in trouble for trampling on the lawn or for beating up others. . . today, I get a lot of money for it!"

Waiting for the results.

Football Blockers.

'Him? Oh, he's my job interview coach.'

Another entry from the encyclopedia of gaming: Pixel sprain - any physical injury incurred from intense video game play.

'No exceptions, Caldwell! If you want to make this team, you've got to make it past my mother-in-law!'

"Learning percentages has made me realize there's a 50% chance I'll flunk math."

"Yes, it's report card time again."

'Oh, great. Leonard's got quarterback on his jersey. No amount of bleach is going to get THAT out.'

Power Point Hell

"Good news, you are virus free and should be able to resume hitting each other in the heads as hard as possible this fall."

'It's so cool we have another test today.'

'Activist investors are here to see you and they're wearing boxing gloves.'