Safety Savant Gifts

"They're fake. Part of the new false sense of security system."

Heath and Safety Minefield

You can put an end to all your phobias by investing in the germ and radiation proof 'kiddysafe'.

ACME, Inc. For the man who has everything. It's a home security company.

Consumer Safety Testing Lab. Bake-it Toy Oven. We have lots of work to do --- Now get the lead out!

Fireman chasing the olympic flame.

Falls at work.

"Jimmy, I want you to meet our new safety officer."

'Well, now that I know he's the owner's son, yes, he's the best damned wine steward I've ever seen.'

'OK, now let's be careful out there.'

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

"And you're certain these are accidents?"

'I guess my brain just started to really care about itself.'

'You're right. Our old safety files have become a safety concern.'

"Could you all please pay attention while I go through the emergency procedure. . ."

On the brink.

Baby on board.

Two people in hazmat suits lie in bed

'Good thing it has a child-proof cap.'

"Helmet, check. Harness, check. Knee and elbow pads, check. You may now push the swing."

"Forget the allowance - I need a benefactor!"

Caution signs.

Job Safety - Pumpkin.

Health and safety notice falling on builder.

Daddy showed me why I should always wear my bicycle helmet!

Mother hen driving with 'Eggs on Board' sign.

"I think I found a location for our vacation."

Dr Ed Henderson demonstrates that it IS possible for someone to become too familiar with the safety rules.

'News headline: Britain unsafe to bring up young children.'

'Whoa! This was supposed to be an easy merit badge!'

"Now that's a great number if you want to be protected from the entire environment."

A fire extinguisher box with band aids in them has a sign above with reads, "In case you cut yourself breaking glass break this glass."

'Yeah, the job's got great benefits, but mainly I like the safe work environment.'

'I'm getting some unusually high readings around you.'

'Gentlemen, I'd like to introduce you to our new 'health and safety' officer.'