Safety Regulation Critic Gifts

I threw my back out picking up the guidelines

'Please leave the light on, dear. I'm afraid there might be OSHA inspectors under the bed.' 'Managers at Night.'

"The sign ruins our surprise attack, but it's a big OSHA fine if we don't have it."

'I've drawn up a health and safety policy for the company.'

'Cutting back to a single securities regulator is a good idea. After that, one more reduction and our troubles are over.'

'My parents only said 'don't accept rides from strangers,' but I'm the one asking to go with YOU.'

"These safety goggles are sucking the fun out of the sandbox."

'So the guidance suggests that if anyone threatens you, throw it them.'

'Ooops! No got that wrong, those two chemicals should never be mixed...'

"The good news is that your husband will never again ignore the company's safety instructions..."

Penitentiary (No Criminal Testing).

'I am prosecuting you for a breach of article 5 of the explosives act, storing black powder in a dangerous manor on unlicensed premises.'

Health and safety officer Hedley seconds before he became ex-health and safety officer...

Man in church sees sign: Thank you for not yawning.

'Yeah, I used to live with thousands of my friends in the kitchen of a restaurant, but for some reason, it was closed down...'

"You're not a bad dog for driving. You're a bad dog for not wearing a seat belt."

"Of course not everyone believes in all the health and safety rules....Jim here thinks it's all complete nonsense!"

Warning: this is a safe area.

'I know we shouldn't have rats in the kitchen...but he's the only one who understands the H&S regulations!'

'I'm from Health & Safety...... I wonder if I might have a word....'

Rules and procedure

If you're going to start working with dangerous stuff like this new "fire" think, you'd better incorporate.

Safety is about FAMILY!...

The seemingly wanton destruction of private property corp.

'It's a new federal safety regulation. We have to slide a mattress behind you before we hand you your bill.'

'A metal plate in your head does not qualify as a helmet.'

'Well that seems conclusive, a soft fabric chefs hat is no protection against a 5L can of beans...'

"For goodness sake, I don't need to do a new risk assessment each time I cut a new tree..."

Quality Control in the Traffic Light Department - "Red, Amber, Green.. Red Amber.. "

'Remarkably the only fatalities from this crash were the two passengers who failed to return their trays to the upright positions.'

Take no shortcuts! Assess the risks!...

Caution - Sign partly concealed by bush

"Never mind honey, I found the garage door opener."

'But in all fairness, Ms Frimley, the guillotine isn't intended as an interactive display.'

'Apparently it's not suitable for the elderly or children...'