Safety Joking Advocate Pillows

"Excuse me driver, but your guard is stuck in the doors!"

Clyde thought “Atomic Sparklers” was just an ad gimmick

Pool attached to child's bed.

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

Man using to much bug spray

Caution: Driver Watching "Hard Copy"

'Another one? Do you realize it will make the third time this month we've held a fire drill?'

Noah's life jacket demonstration

"Getting the hang of it?"

Driving on the Beach - Lifeguard on a hydraulic lift.

"Careful."

Squash Courts - "Insurance anyone"

"I told him not to rely on his GPS whe out running!"

Safety Barriers

Mountain Climber With Pillow Padding.

"I didn't see the coffee table in the middle of the room, due to my visual impairment, caused by the rubbish light emitted by the government approved 150 watt energy saving bulb in my apartment..."

'Okay, the motorized rocking chair could use an emergency off switch.'

Fire door.

Fume Leaks on aeroplane - 'Perfume? Drinks? Air?'

Man who has hailed a taxi finds the driver is a crash test dummy.

Under Capitalism, Expensive Equipment is Always, Unlike People, Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Kangaroo: Baby on Board

'Okay - who removed Jessica's sunhat..?'

"Ya know, that cork was there for a reason."

The first 10,000 fans got a concussion bobblehead!

'We want more police on our streets!' 'WHAT?! Do you have any idea how dangerous it is out there?'

Boozing and Cruising

'Knowledge is the ultimate weapon. Next!'

Model employee reads 'Best Practice' document ... scruffy slob reads 'Worst Practice', with messy desk and dangerous wires.

Speeding Forklift

'This is a new electronic child-proof cap. If you can pronounce the drug's name, it opens.'

Under Capitalism, Expensive Equipment is Always, Unlike People, Innocent Until Proven Guilty

'I know they look geeky - but I believe lat good parenting should always come before style.'

'If you ask me, toys are getting far too realistic!'

"I keep telling him there's a big difference between swimming and floating."