Safety First Foodie Pillows

T-Bones STEAK House...NO sissy salad bar!...Heimlich expert always on duty'

would you like it with extra botulism and a touch of salmonella?

Kitchen Kapers

Health and Safety Gone Mad.

'Notice how with truth in packaging requirements all the labels begin with ‘OMG!''

Honest Vending

HELLth Food Sprouts

"Please don't kill me."

'Waiter, there's a hairball in my soup, too.'

'According to these latest tests, anything can cause anything.'

'Your fingers are in the soup?' - 'Of course they are. It's freezing in that kitchen.'

"What do you have that won't kill me?"

"I'd hold off on the peking duck another five minutes...the show's almost over."

"It's so nice to gather and enjoy a simple home-cooked meal together."

'Don't worry it's organic...'

'Fish has mercury, meat has e-coli, veggies have pesticides, desserts cause obesity...so we'll have the health-concious nothing for dinner' special.'

The FDA studies 'Tobacco'.

Toxic Waste Lorry/Toxic Additives Lorry

Restaurant menu board: 'Day old - 2 day old - 3 day old'

'They are boneless, I didn't say anything about beaks.'

"There's a big green giant at the door!"

"I'm going in."

"According to these latest tests, anything can cause anything."

"Our vegan dishes are the same as what cows eat: Nitrates, Pesticides, Ammonia, Antibiotics..."

'For no particular reason I want to know the location of our fire extinguisher.'

"The penicillin looks good."

"Dad, did you know Tia Carmen got a job at my school cafeteria?"

Frankenfish

A genetically-modified,hydroponically-grown tomato conducts a taste-test of its own.

Genetically Altered Salmon (and other foods) Research

"There is nothing dangerous about GM foods!" "Keep talking or we'll smash your head in"

'This tuna is being recalled. It contains seahorse.'

"I think the milk's off!"

At first, Moses was worried about the manna from heaven.

'He can dish it out but can he take it?'