Safety First Champion Pillows

"Ouch!... That hand sanitiser is a bit feisty..."

A baby duck in a tiny car seat on the mother duck's back.

'I guess my brain just started to really care about itself.'

"Did you bring any protection with you?"

'Don't leave baby alone with this really cool tiny phone. It's a choking hazard.'

'I'm afraid that serves you right for not wearing your safety goggles!'

'Mum...Dad's barbecued his face again.'

"I don't care why you crossed the road! I do care however about "how" you crossed the road: without checking for cars first!"

Reasonableman

TV chef sets the TV on fire.

'For no particular reason I want to know the location of our fire extinguisher.'

"Here comes the super-visor."

"How would you rate your toleration for risk?"

"Pity that 'on' button's a bit of a stretch."

"Peter quickly learns the limitations of his new hamster ball."

'In the few remaining minutes of the lesson I can't do better than to show you how to fill an accident form.'

'I'm a doctor... This man needs someone who can grant me immunity from liability, and fast.'

'I don't like being a crash dummy either but there are some jobs humans won't do.'

'Will you watch where you're going with that thing?'

Contagious Diseases.

"Just one last crossing to make..."

'Never shoot straight up.'

Dept of Health and Safety founder was accident victim.

'He swallowed a warning label!'

"Now just hold on a minute, fellers. This thing doesn't look to be very safe at all."

"...this one has even a little emergency phone to ring the hospital if you cut yourself."

'Never thought I'd see you again - you really must have nine lives.'

Barber has strapped boy in barber chair with a safety belt.

'Next time you lose your keys, please call a locksmith instead of blowtorching the door.'

'I'm on beach-patrol today: It's sunscreen in there...'

"To play it safe, I've stopped shaking hands and hugging."

Man wearing bullet proof vest to protect himself against pool players