Safety Champion Pillows

"It's all very well to argue the case for the unions but in the cold hard light of day I think it's fair to ask what have the unions ever done for us?"

Humbug! What has health and safety ever done ! Apart from dramatically reduce accidents at work...cut serious injuries...reduce time off sick...

'Attention! Would the owner of a black SUV, license plate 946SW7R, please move your vehicle? You're blocking the fire exit.'

Job Safety - Safety Goal.

'I don't like being a crash dummy either but there are some jobs humans won't do.'

Conductor: 'Oh for PETE'S SAKE LENNY NOT right now! I'm in the middle of Conducting a Fire Drill!'

"Well, maybe next time you'll listen when Mommy tells you not to run with a porcupine."

"You lose! Those can't cut anything."

Schooling during the Pandemic

"...he's the factory inspector."

'A 'Horseman of the Apocalypse' or not, my motto is 'safety first'!'

A face mask

"We're concerned about the number of accidents in the workplace."

"Aww, c'mon, mom! None of the other kids have to wear their rubber bands on their claws."

Gen Z

The 11th commandment: Thou shalt socially distance and wear a mask

"I don't think you'll need your umbrella... They said there's only a 30% chance of rain."

'We all have to maintain our personal boundaries. I'm prepared to maintain mine with pepper spray.'

"Just one last crossing to make..."

Covid Regulations in Cuban Schools

Teacher Training School - Dealing with an armed gunman.

"OK, you have your assignments for today, and remember, safety first: Ensure the kids wear their riding helmets..."

'Safety on the beach.'

Lollipop men on strike.

A baby duck in a tiny car seat on the mother duck's back.

The dangers of social media.

'And to think I worried about safe sex.'

'I'm afraid that serves you right for not wearing your safety goggles!'

Only Larry showed a look of concern as he remembered his mother's warnings that he should never run with Scissors.

'Don't leave baby alone with this really cool tiny phone. It's a choking hazard.'

'How's the new company car?'

'No, we don't have to volunteer for the Odd/Even Day No Drive To Conserve Gas Campaign.'

"We really can't go to the ER right now."