Safety First Promoter Pillows

'Never shoot straight up.'

Clyde thought “Atomic Sparklers” was just an ad gimmick

Pool attached to child's bed.

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

Man using to much bug spray

'I guess my brain just started to really care about itself.'

"Did you bring any protection with you?"

Bench Press Accident

"Getting the hang of it?"

'Mum...Dad's barbecued his face again.'

Reasonableman

"Careful."

Squash Courts - "Insurance anyone"

TV chef sets the TV on fire.

The Dangers of Not Getting Enough Sleep...

"I told him not to rely on his GPS whe out running!"

'Okay, the motorized rocking chair could use an emergency off switch.'

"How would you rate your toleration for risk?"

'We don't want to risk having any injuries during spring training.'

"Here comes the super-visor."

Man who has hailed a taxi finds the driver is a crash test dummy.

Under Capitalism, Expensive Equipment is Always, Unlike People, Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Kangaroo: Baby on Board

'Okay - who removed Jessica's sunhat..?'

'For no particular reason I want to know the location of our fire extinguisher.'

The first 10,000 fans got a concussion bobblehead!

'We want more police on our streets!' 'WHAT?! Do you have any idea how dangerous it is out there?'

Boozing and Cruising

'Knowledge is the ultimate weapon. Next!'

Model employee reads 'Best Practice' document ... scruffy slob reads 'Worst Practice', with messy desk and dangerous wires.

"Pity that 'on' button's a bit of a stretch."

Speeding Forklift

'This is a new electronic child-proof cap. If you can pronounce the drug's name, it opens.'

'Just say no to ch-e-e-s-ee!'

"Peter quickly learns the limitations of his new hamster ball."