Safety Crusaders Gifts

'Can I call you back?'

Clyde thought “Atomic Sparklers” was just an ad gimmick

Pool attached to child's bed.

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

Man using to much bug spray

Kangaroo mom to child, 'We're not going anywhere until you buckle-up, young man.'

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: 'Sitting Up'

"I've had it with the helmet mandates."

Noah's life jacket demonstration

"Getting the hang of it?"

"The crash-test rating on this puppy is off the charts!"

'Mind how you cross the ocean.'

"Careful."

A Crash-test Dummy child about to have a ride on a car crash test ride in a shopping centre mall.

Squash Courts - "Insurance anyone"

The Dangers of National Safety Week.

A fire extinguisher box with band aids in them has a sign above with reads, "In case you cut yourself breaking glass break this glass."

'And though he died during the hunt, we can only assume that George L Jones would want this new species of butt-faced clown monkey to forever bear his name.'

"I told him not to rely on his GPS whe out running!"

Dr Ed Henderson demonstrates that it IS possible for someone to become too familiar with the safety rules.

'Okay, the motorized rocking chair could use an emergency off switch.'

'He refused to climb the ladder without a safety net.'

"Let's face it Mum, the main reason we're an endangered species is that we're fussy eaters..."

Man who has hailed a taxi finds the driver is a crash test dummy.

Boozing and Cruising

'We would deliver if we could cross the street.'

'We want more police on our streets!' 'WHAT?! Do you have any idea how dangerous it is out there?'

"If they can rig emissions tests, why can't they fake crash tests too?"

Is this what they call inherent safety?

Under Capitalism, Expensive Equipment is Always, Unlike People, Innocent Until Proven Guilty

Kangaroo: Baby on Board

'Okay - who removed Jessica's sunhat..?'

"If it's nothing serious' why did you put on five pairs of gloves?"

The first 10,000 fans got a concussion bobblehead!

'Knowledge is the ultimate weapon. Next!'