Rustic Food Lover T-Shirts

"Lori, out here it's my kitchen!"

Grandma's caf

'Is this still America?'

"Yuppies! There goes the hood!"

Country farmhouse loaf / Inner city highrise loaf.

"Life is beautiful, and it's messy."

'We can always cook it one half at a time.'

'Oh, I plow the fields, Greta takes care of the house, and young Johan, here, maintains the website.'

'This is cow country, pal, and we're not real big on innovation.'

'Toilet paper, Lassie! Fetch toilet paper! Stupid mutt!'

"God, I miss the old days!"

Country life

In the Works: Eurocheese, Eurobread, Eurowine.

'Would Sir care for a hot towel?'

"And how do expect to pay for this, Mr Morton?"

'To authenticate this recipe, first purchase a Soil Association accredited small holding in an unspoilt and exclusive locale, steadily add copious illustrated puff pieces to the nation press and plug. . .'

'We like to welcome new team members with three cheers and a wet towel.'

Grandparents with their grandchild

"Sometimes I come up here and think about the great meals I've eaten."

Early American Think Tank.

Noah Cappe - Host of Carnival Eats

'You seem to be suffering from frontier mentality...'

'Good news! We've finished the Christmas leftovers.'

"Gourmet burgers on rustic platters - coming right up!"

"It's steak and chips, it is what the ploughman had for lunch!"

'A wee bowl of porridge can set you up for the day!'

Related

"This is sort of my little homage to the American farm woman."

"Done already? Wow!" "Yup, a new record. Just under two years."

Be Believable Anywhere, Anytime in these Quality Fib Overalls.

'I figured this would make great soup - I got it from a hunter this morning!'

Christmas carol: 'Blow your budget stuff your trolley, tr-la-la-la-laaa-la-la-la-la...'

'Well Cookie. . . it looks like some horse droppings, cattle droppings, some tumbleweeds, barbed wire and parts from an old wagon. . . What the heck do you call it??'

Campaign for Real Spit'n'Sawdust

'Lovely soup. Just like my mother used to open.'