Runaway Humorist Gifts

"Why don't you take up a sport,son-like long distance running-away from home...?"

Dear Diary. . . why, oh why, did I choose an adventure holiday?

Airport Security.

The Euro-Trash Trashcan

'Camping is nature's way of promoting B&Bs.'

'Maybe it should be funnier...'

"Let's see, I make it four suitcases, a rolling bag, and a tote bag... You sure that's enough for our two day trip?"

Sock Puppet in Literature

'Hang on a second, I think I have a sand castle in my shoe.'

Bob's Driving School.

"Didn't you just say that?"

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

'If the GPS has to tell you, 'No, we're not there yet' one more time...'

"I thought they just hibernated for the winter."

"We're off. We got a loan to fill er up!"

'This one is a bit different - twelve Indian call centres in eight days.'

"Rule #1: don't offer to carry anything!"

'Our trip to Florida was great until Rob took us driving with the dolphins.'

'Are we there yet! Are we there yet! Are we there yet!'

"Well, we did book the Grill Suite I suppose."

Billy strip: comic will make you sick.

"There will be a Q&A...but in this era of Trump I will be insulting anyone whose questions I don't like."

The leaning tower of Pizza.

'Your luggage went to Bosnia-Herzegovina, sir, and I'm afraid they're holding it for ransom.'

Biliard Enthusiast

Shakespeare Ave

A pocket of pygmies - "Have you anything to declare sir?"

Val and Les could see a fork in the road but they weren't expecting a dip.

Orville Wright, not sure he wants to eat airline food, brings a sandwich to his historic first flight.

'HA! Your last chance 86 miles back.'

'One carry-on!'

"Once again, how little did you pay for this room?"

"I think I know why they call it 'Happydale'!"

"Admit it, you're lost!"

'Are we nearly there yet Dad?'