Rug Seller Gifts

"That's against the rules...."

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

'Sorry about this, but I really need a rug for my bachelor pad.'

'I'll take the one on the right.'

"I understand they've uncovered some weird new side effects since you were here last."

'Oh Elias! It's simply the cutest bear rug I ever did see!'

'My husband's just getting some ready to show you.'

'Big Issue...'

Grocer with pretensions of being a soldier

"Great news! They just bought a new rug we can throw up on!"

'I'll have three of those trout, but throw them to me. . . I want to tell the wife I caught them.'

"So Marty, how's business these days?" "Great. I've just sold my homing pigeon for the 34th time."

"The carpet really brings the room together."

'I'm melting! I'm melting! and on the good rug, too!'

Man saying 'Bless you!' to a Big Issue vendor.

'I'm sorry, but I just don't think you're cut out to sell real estate.'

'I have high hopes of Wisden knocking the Da Vinci code off the top of the best sellers list.'

'Oh, how utterly romantic! A hunter rug in front of the fireplace!'

The world's oldest braided rug

'Where is the rest of your inventory? Why isn't there a price tag on this one? Just what kind of rug store is this anyway?'

A street scene.

Live goldfish for sale

The way I look at it...give a man a fish and you got a potential customer. Teach a man to fish and you lose market share.

"Let's cut some rug!"

A rug skinned bear

"Whoa! You must have eight rugs on! How's that feel? Are you warm enough?"

"I'm not angry. I just want to know what you have against 17th-century Isfahan rugs."

A man steps on the tail of an animal skin rug

"Oh, and remember to roll up the rug the other way when you're done so it'll lie flat again."

"Sales of your book has been slow. We've decided to put it out on video."

F&E Floor Coverings. Your carpet will be $750 plus tacks.

Book on selling.

Flea Exodus

Heaven on a stick.

'How to survive chapter 11.'