Royalty Researcher Pillows

"They've solved the cause of death of Richard III."

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

'You can just forget about the cake.'

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

The Grasshopper's Feast: A Prophetic Vision

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

'How about a game of cards?'

Czarcasm

"He's a guard dog."

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

'Gunboat diplomacy won't work, sire -- we're landlocked, remember?'

'Well, nobody can say you haven't grown in office.'

'I can't finish -- may I have a peasant-bag?'

DOWN WITH THE KING!, 'Do you know what the PENALTY is for disturbing the peace during wartime?'

A king and his paperwork.

"I don't suppose you get many sovereign rulers in here anymore?"

'Charles, you're carrying this 'king of the castle' business too far!'

'I screwed up royally!'

'Scroll down for the good stuff!'

'He was born with a silver spoon all right, but not in his mouth.'

'The deficit doesn't look nearly so bad now that we've switched to Arabic numerals.'

'Democracy? -- do you REALLY want the bars closed every election day?'

'Small favor, Elizabeth - before we enter the throne room, drop back ten paces.'

'Frankincense, dummy! I asked for frankincense!'

'You're reordering your priorities? -- Since when do you have priorities?'

'It's the Secretary-General of the United Nations -- are you here?'

Cat king.

'I couldn't get Parliament to outlaw Lady Godiva, but they agreed to regulate her.'

'When did we permit the Jester to start doing impressions?'

'It's amazing what you can get on e-Bay these days.'