Royalty Enjoyer Pillows

"Royal jelly again!! I'm so sick of royal jelly..."

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

"Once upon a time, there was a princess who wasn't about to take anyone's sh*t."

'Now that's an afro!'

Knight Golfing

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

'How about a game of cards?'

King George I

'Gerry just can't seem to relax on holiday.'

"The peasants are revolting Sire."

TV jester.

'How about a game of cards?'

"She wishes to range free!"

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

'You've got to cure my sleepwalking, Doc - I keep falling into the moat!'

'You've made a powerful enemy'

Czarcasm

"He's a guard dog."

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

'Gunboat diplomacy won't work, sire -- we're landlocked, remember?'

"'Conquer Spain'? 'Balance the budget'? 'Reform the justice system'? -- You call this a honey-do list?"

'Well, nobody can say you haven't grown in office.'

'I'd think you'd be used to having a moat by now.'

'I can't finish -- may I have a peasant-bag?'

"With all due respect, Sire, the Pizza King sends his kindest regards."

"Messenger, dost thou bring me good news or dost thou bring me bad news?"

The Frog Prince