Royal Role-player Pillows

Not 'Time' or 'Newsweek' yet, Sire — but you made the cover of 'Dungeons and Dragons'!

'Try this, dear, it's enough to take your head off.'

'Coming up! One meal, fit for a King!'

'Although we've vanquished the invaders from Paperland, we really should have allied with them for the impending attack on us by Rockland!'

'Sorry about the war, folks - I was off my meds.'

'How about a game of cards?'

'This vacation, let's go on something OTHER than a power trip.'

A couple dressed as a knife and fork

'It would never work out, Blackfire — our alignments are too different.'

"No, wait a minute. I'm King. You're Rex."

The Royal Wii

King Pin

'I was all ready to deal with the military, but I never expected an IRS coup!'

'They say a man's home is his castle...here's your sceptre, your highness, the throne is plugged!'

'I seek an audience with the king.'

'What do you mean you don't believe I'm really a Princess?'

Emperor Trump and Sultan Erdogan

'I could have SWORN I outlawed dragons!'

'Go on then.....Rule!'

'Apparently, they've gone rogue, Al. They've stopped playing roles and are speaking for themselves, and what we have here are two very disturbed bruins.'

Ethelred II

'Don't you remember These are bar stools where we first met.'

'Well, yes. We are losing the battle, sire. But this is just an exhibition...'

"We are not under siege, Your Majesty. You just have a siege mentality."

All new holiday season hard wear.

"How would you like to be queen for a day?"

'The chef says the closest thing he has to 'four and twenty blackbirds baked in a pie' is quiche.'

"Oh, there's Iza---I know her from my matriarch's group."

'Not only did they overthrow me, the bums also kept the damage deposit!'

'My brother-in-law asked for political asylum, so I had him committed.'

"For Hispanic Heritage Month, I declare myself...queen of Hispanic heritage!"

A king stands on his balcony; his legs match the balustrade.

"Overtime on the Humpty-Dumpty project is killing the treasury."

'Michael and I are playing 'married.' I'm getting ready and he's sitting in the car beeping the horn.'

'Has winning all that money changed him, you ask...?'