Royal Role-playing Enthusiast Pillows

'You'd better have a little talk with Rupert -- he beheaded his teddy bear today.'

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

"I’ve tried to make this as painless as possible ... clearly I’ve failed."

'Now that's an afro!'

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

King George I

'You've got to cure my sleepwalking, Doc - I keep falling into the moat!'

"You be the moral grandstander and I'll be the politically incorrect troll."

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

'How about a game of cards?'

'This vacation, let's go on something OTHER than a power trip.'

"Seriously, you can't balance the budget with cushion change."

"He doesn't suffer fools gladly."

'Some people just aren't cut out for adventure gaming, Bruno — maybe you should try chess or checkers.'

"Most of the time it's 'Me Tarzan, you Jane', until we get into the bedroom. Then he's all, 'You Tarzan, Me Jane'."

'It would never work out, Blackfire — our alignments are too different.'

'Your Grandpa achieved greatness, he thrust greatness upon me, and then you were born great!'

'Don't bother Daddy -- He fell in the moat again.'

The Unhappy King

'Henry, we can't begin to make progress unless your friend leaves the room.'

'We're playing doctor ??" Billy's the anesthetist.'

'How can you say I'm a bad actress, Tarzan?'

"They're class action figures."

"Of all the labour saving devices invented in the last 70 years, this is one's favourite."

Royal Love

'He'll stop being so smug when he gets his first dent.'

''Depression'? -- You or the country or both?'

'We've been playing house for 5 minutes, and she's already nagging me to get a job.'

"To be fair, I think you should be very clear about the ground rules with your next jester."

'Our top theologians have studied the issue, Your Majesty, and they agree that you're damned if you do and damned if you don't.'

Everybody forgot his jubilee.

"I'm popping out for a tinkle."

Hoodies anticipate bride's choice of wedding dress.