Royal Family Followers Pillows

Pizza Prince

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

Photos of Queen Elizabeth II

'Sure, real estate prices are sky-high, but kings don't sell their castles, and that's that.'

"Possible exception to Prince William's proposed halt on space travel." proposed halt on space travel."

"Don't even think about it! I am the property of the English Monarch!"

"Of all the labour saving devices invented in the last 70 years, this is one's favourite."

Reign Man

"And His Majesty sends you a great big kiss, too."

'It's been a pretty slow day -- What say we knock off a couple hours early?'

"And to think he started in accounting."

'I'm a guard dog too.'

"He's retreated into nationalism."

"'Happily ever after' you want? Then you keep the house kosher!"

Beefeater

'My son made it for me in shop class.'

'Not till you're sixteen.'

My horse for a kingdom.

Duchess of Cambridge

'I told the jester he could take April Fool's Day off.'

POLLS, 'If an election were being held today....'

"What do you mean, Grandma granted you asylum?"

'I know you had to give him a job because he's a relative, but I still think a Press Secretary should know how to read and write.'

'We're out of blackbirds -- how about four-and-twenty hamburgers?'

'It creeps me out when he watches the History Channel and takes notes!'

Catherine the Great with her daughter Nora Soso

Canute Does It Again

'You're just lazy! -- Don't give me that 'metal fatigue' stuff!'

'When I first met the queen she was a hat check girl and I had to marry her to get my crown back.'

'You learned WHAT about me in history class?'

The Loneliness of Power

Possible Titles For My Upcoming Autobiography

'For added curb appeal, I think you should fill the moat.'

London Gin Company Limited - By Appointment to Queen Mother

Charles entered wholeheartedly into the Royal image re-building.