Rowboat Romantic T-Shirts

"Show-off!"

"The TV remote? So, I decide what we watch tonight?"

"Excuse me, I think you'll find I've reserved that luggage rack space ..."

Riverboat 4 Square Hustlers

"Boss, I guarantee you that my intentions with your daughter are serious."

Rude Snowpeople

Summer wants.

'Shuck me.'

Sorry, I can't talk right now, I'm giving my baby a bottle.

Waterfall of Disappointment

"The little engine that shoulda coulda woulda."

'Though we understand your feelings towards your automobile, we aren't able to approve your application to marry it.'

'listen - it's haute cuisine, coming up the river from New Orleans.'

An old gentleman speaking with a shoeblack at a train station

"Why would I care if you're not a pure breed? That's a human concern! Sure, I'll go out with you tonight..."

"May we see your kids' menu please?"

Beachcomber sees that smartphone displays 'message in a bottle.'

Cupid

'Sometimes I wish I'd learned to play an instrument.'

"Mm, you smell terrif- ... no, wait. That's me."

"Ma? I met someone!"

'Oh no! Not 'Barnacle Bill the Sailor', again.'

"I should have know he was a control freak when he seduced me in his signal box."

Stanley's Two Weeks In August

The happy union of rail and trucking.

'For the benefit of the passenger who joined the train at Watford Junction, this is the non-stop London to Birmingham High-Speed service.'

"Oh, baby, hot caramel? You're going to dip me in hot caramel? I'll be right over."

"I find trains so romantic don't you?"

Dreaming of Summer

The little infrastructure that couldn't

Woman having tea in a train carriage

'Come on inside, baby. Let me show you where the magic happens.'

"You have a date with Tim Jones? Really? You're so wicked: he's at least a day younger than you!"

'I like my whisky like I like my women. . . A 18-year-old mixed up with coke.'