Routine Navigators Gifts

"Are we at anchor?"

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

The Life of Pi

"He was the one everyone called 'The Greatest.' Then one day, a stranger turned up in town."

"It's not just him. The whole system's down."

"But you didn't say they had to make sense - you just told us to write a thousand words a day."

"We need warning stickers on this side warning not to ignore all the other warning stickers on the other side."

'They've dealyed our IPO so long that we've gone from intending to open a chain of pre-schools to opening a chain of nursing homes.'

I cannot tell you why men will not ask for directions

'Face it, you'd be lost without me!'

Number Phobia.

A day in the life, summed up in 6 frames.

"Instead of days, my pill organizer is divided into months."

"Oh shut up."

"Feel free to hydrate during my presentation."

'We're to spend more time engaging with patients on a more compassionate 'human' level...and here are the guidelines on how to do it!'

"And would you like to continue paying no taxes at the 15, 10 or 20% rate?"

"Honey, I'll be right back – I forgot to stop at the bar on the way home."

'Yes, it is a stressful job.'

"Dad, how often have I told you there's no point in trying to start an argument with the sat-nav?"

Pick a direction.

"I hope that the next time you dive into a good book, you first check to see how deep it is!"

Desk Organizers: 'Comply with Government Regulations and Guidelines.'

Swerving and arguning lane

'I'm counting on you to explain to your parents how to view the e-updates on the healthcare plan.'

'Neither MapQuest or Google Earth could give me directions to happiness.'

'According to the map, we're about to sail off the end of the earth.'

All Roads Lead To Rome.

For centuries, I've trusted my gut. Which one of you talked me into using GPS? Recalculating.

The Conversation Cafe

'It's from the PCT...they want us to reduce bullying in the practice or they're going to cut our funding and send someone around to kick out A****'

'Book of Usernames' / 'Book of Baby Names'.

My book agent, Laurie, sold my memoirs. It's a gut-wrenching tale of how I overcame the odds. It's based on actual events. Not actual events in my life. They didn't ask! The memoir mantra: Don't as, don't tell.

'Please Miss, I know what comes before 8. My school bus!'