Roulette Aficionado Pillows

Christmas Gambles

'Snake eyes or no snake eyes, the tall, skinny guy at the end of the table wins again.'

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

"I don't know why you always have to choose the same hide-and-go-seek hiding spot that I do, Tommy!"

Golfing Boss

'We like the occasional drink on the patio.'

It is best dealt with by the 'Pitch and Run Shot'.

"Buy a man a six-pack, he drinks for a day. Teach him to brew, he drinks all his life."

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

"Jack Daniels-in-a-box"

"Yes, sir, Dave. Out here, under the big sky, I always get back in touch with who I am."

Camping-Pong

Executive golf with Newton's cradle

"You know what they say, time flies when you're having rum!"

"There are no such things as problems, only opportunities."

'Okay then, what's the price break on TWENTY drinks?'

'The way I see it, drinking is its own reward.'

"Yes, three of a kind beats two pair."

A Snowman falls down drunk outside a bar.

'He wrote a whole book on how to play a slot machine. I'm anxious for his next one: How to Set an Alarm Clock.'

Wine Tasting and Wine Guzzling

Antler Buzzers.

'OK Mr and Mrs Johnson let's spin the wheel and find you a child!'

"I'm sure you've heard of foodies - he's a drinkie."

'... And your wife says; don't bother looking for the key to the drinks cabinet, because she's hidden it where you'll never find it.'

'I love these senior citizen discounts.'

"I see you've flown around the world in a plane, and settled revolutions in Spain. Around a golf course you're under par. Metro-Goldwyn has asked you to star. Very impressive, I must admit, but we're looking for someone with marketing experience."

Martini Lovers

The truth about the expulsion from paradise. . .

'We are now entering sombre hour, happy hour has finished.'

'This may be an old computer, but it won the March Madness office pool again and wants the money deposited in its Swiss bank account.'

'Don't worry, the dog's a sales manager!'

'Good dog.'