Roof Specialist Gifts

Umbrella Roof

'Due to the poor response to the roof repair fund we cannot afford to lift the rafters when rejoicing in song.'

'You've reached McWit Quality Construction. If your foundation has cracked, press 1, if your plumbing is leaking press 2, if your house is collapsing, press 3 ...'

'Humans are so considerate: They put perches like these for us on every one of their houses...'

Fuel bill gone through the roof

"Lady... I gotta work order to fix a leaky roof."

"All new appliances, brand new subway tile backsplash and a unique kitchen island; notice those coconuts!"

Man falls through ceiling - 'Did you find the leak?'

Dave took his motto, 'Roofing done in one hour' seriously, even nailing shingles before plywood had been put down.

Under New Mismanagement

Authentic Rinkelmier chair (Built 1723)

'They did a great job in restoring all the 19th century details, but this confounded dress code...'

'How do you propose to repair the roof from down there?!'

Bathing and Showering.

"It's the stock brokerage company again. Some of their investment picks have gone through the roof again."

Rodin's Roofing Contractor

Watering rooftop lawn floods building.

'-and now a prayer for the roof fund...'

"It's just a hunch, but you may have the power set too high on your pressure washer."

Algebra Research Center: Come In We're Slopin'

Straightening up.

'The health elf will never find me up here.'

'See! I told you the roof needed repairing.'

"The really skilled part is getting the customers to pay up within six months"

Dish tied to roof

'See! I told you the roof needed repairing.'

"I never heard of a kitchen renovation, either, that was not followed by a divorce."

Antiques, Furniture Stripping, Stripping.

"Dad's shingling the roof and mom says she's inches away to an insurance claim that will change her life."

Clearly, this pair were planning on getting up to something...

'Do you suppose we'll ever qualify for 'Total Island Makeover'?'

Ceiling Specialists Meet in the Middle.

I love the sound of rain on my roof!

"Huh? What patch didn't take?"

'The bank won't give us a loan for a new roof because we both had a vaccination for shingles.'