Romantic Trickster Pillows

'I've been in love with the same woman for 40 years. I just hope my wife never finds out!'

Canned laughter for sale in Theatrical Supplies shop.

"This will be hilarious!"

"I just need help getting the pit out."

"Better luck next time, kid."

"I must insist on my lawyer present."

A cat is hiding in a block of cheese to lure a mouse out of its hole.

'They were all out of roses.'

'Not bad, for naughty.'

"In the hat! In the hat!"

Wordplay: Mandate - Escort Agency.

Mime Tug-of-War

'You should have seen the one that got away!'

Man proposes using strong flour as a ring.

"Do you have a Venus Fly Trap?"

I'm sending myself three Valentine's cards...that should keep my hubby on his toes!

"Our violinist isn't here tonight, but Tony here will be happy to play something romantic on his cymbals for you."

Forcing the Rabbit to Eat the Magicians Hat.

Scarecrow Directions

I thought we'd get fake tattoos of each other's names. If we're still together in 10 years, we'll get real ones.'

"So Marty, how's business these days?" "Great. I've just sold my homing pigeon for the 34th time."

'Honey, this is Alonzo

The balance of power shifted when sparky figured out how to use the laser pointer.

'Okay, this is the scene where the bear becomes a parachute.'

'If my husband comes home, duck out that door. . . He'll never see you.'

'Say when.'

Man is walking his dachshund with a Happy Valentines Day balloon tied around dog's belly lifting it off of the sidewalk.

Fry's Family: Uncle Frank always preferred his eggs hard-boiled.

'Take that off, Fuller. You're scaring the hell out of everyone!'

"Do you mind?"

'Whatever you do don't press the parallel dimensions button again!'

Pianist Fraud

'Aagh- are you sure you checked the smell-by date?'